“I’m tiiiiiired!”  “My hand is sore!”  “How many more minutes until I get a break?”  These are questions we may hear repeatedly as our kids are pushing through school-related tasks.  How can my child play video games or build Lego structures for hours on end, when he/she can only colour or write sentences for mere minutes?  It’s all about building growth mindset and resiliency, and with some persistence, you will get there (and the whining will stop…that’s a promise!).

1. Encourage self-motivation: Focus on positive self-talk. Chat with your child about a time you had to overcome a difficult task, and how you were able to talk yourself through it.  They admire you and will be inspired by your success.  We can say to ourselves: “This may be tricky, but I CAN do hard things!”

2. Teach Growth Mindset: The theory is simple – we can become more intelligent with practice and determination. When you push your limitations, improvement is guaranteed.  Empowerment is essential.  We must not say “I can’t do it,” but rather “I can’t do it YET.”

3. Force it a bit (but know when to stop): You are tired too. Sometimes it’s just plain easier to avoid the potential struggle and allow your child to give up.  Don’t do it!  Let them know you are available for support as needed and remind them that they CAN see a task through.  However, do not forget that breaks are necessary.  It is always acceptable to hit pause.  Additionally, switching tasks as needed can help to reframe the brain.

4. Make a list (with boxes to check!): It feels amazing to put that checkmark on your “to do” list. Celebrate successes!  Build your child’s confidence by reminding them that they are smart and resilient.  Connection is key!

Written by Kimberly Desautels, Educational Strategist/Tutor with Wildflowers