Emotions as a Compass: Learn from What You Feel

Emotions as a Compass: Learn from What You Feel

Emotions have a central role in therapy, because often what we say and do is a result of what we feel. Emotions give us important information about our position in the world. They help us make sense of our direction and ultimately give meaning to our existence. Emotions are often 

Many people will work hard to suppress or numb painful emotions. Those very emotions, however, contain clues about what’s working and what’s not working in our lives. Our emotions are like a compass, in that they can guide us when we are lost and help us figure out which direction to go. 

Tracing how we feel and connecting it to what we do (and vice versa) is a critical self-awareness tool. There are many ways in which we unconsciously guard against our feelings, so much so, that it can be hard to pinpoint what may be lurking under the surface. Uncovering the deeper emotions that are layered underneath primary emotions, such as anger, or sadness, can help us to better understand ourselves and our tendencies. 

Anger, for instance, is a go-to emotion for many people because it is directed outward. But anger is only a surface emotion. If you look beneath the surface, you might find feelings you weren’t aware of or don’t want to reveal such as fear, helplessness, envy, loneliness, or insecurity. By plunging deeper and understanding what the base layers of emotion are telling you, not only will you manage your anger in more productive ways, you will likely also find that you won’t feel so angry.

In order to uncover this deeper layer of feeling, you need to get clear about what is happening on the surface. This process takes time, and it’s important to be gentle with yourself and to start small. Therapy is a great environment for expanding our emotional vocabulary and learning to notice and tune in to our inner compass.

Written by: Kerri Hill, Psychologist with Wildflowers